Life's Trials From a Spiritual Perspective

In our pre-mortal life (the time we spent with God before we came here), we learned about trials and tribulations that could and would happen while on Earth. How much each of us comprehended about this varied from person to person, but we all understood that opposition would occur because we knew that we would need a Savior with the power to redeem and heal us. An article in the February 2015 New Era magazine states that “we obtained gospel knowledge, testimony, and faith in the Savior and His Atonement [all that Jesus went through, beginning with his suffering in Gethsemane and culminating in his resurrection, which enables redemption and healing]. These things became an important protection and strength in the war in heaven.” Those of us who chose to follow the Savior were able to not only learn, but continually practice good use of our agency in the presence of the Father. The things we learn about the gospel here on Earth are only extensions and reminders of what we learned with Him.

But Earth life away from the physical presence of the Father isn’t always a nice long walk on the beach during sunset. President Gordon B. Hinckley said it best when he quoted Minister Jenkin Lloyd Jones, who said,

Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. . . . Life is just like an old time rail journey…delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed.

From this quote and our own life experiences, it’s clear that opposition, trials, and tribulations are not just supposed to show up every once in a while, but are to be a normal part of life. The scriptures and Latter-day apostles can confirm this:

John 16:33—In the world ye shall have tribulation.

2 Nephi 2:11—It must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things.

Finally, Elder Neal A. Maxwell reminded us that “If we are serious about our discipleship, Jesus will eventually request each of us to do those very things which are most difficult for us to do” (The Neal A. Maxwell Quote Book).

Anyone who has had to struggle to learn something knows the importance of the struggle in really grasping the concept or lesson to be learned. I would also say that most of us have learned (be it one time or over and over again) that the choices we make in times of trial affect how we view and respond to said trials.

This is important to remember because the trials we experience are so different. Some are easier to navigate while others may seem impossible at times. The how-to-overcome-our-trials process is never cut-and-dry. There are many ways in which we can overcome our trials, and this can greatly depend on how the trial came into our lives. While trials do come in many different forms, I will separate their causes into three categories:

1.      Trials with causes that are out of our control,

2.      Trials that come due to a misuse of our agency (i.e. we made a bad decision), and

3.      Trials that come because someone else misused their agency and we felt the effects.

Trials with causes that are out of our control are things that just happen in life. These have a wide range and can include anything from a natural disaster to a terminal illness or a mass-layoff at a company. During these times, we may ask, “what did I do to deserve this?” We want to believe with everything in us that there’s something we can change in our lives to make it go away or never happen again. But that’s just not the case. We cannot choose to make a storm go away; when a storm comes, we can only choose what we do to keep ourselves safe until it is over. This is where faith and the comforting power of the Atonement comes into the picture.

John 9:1-3 recounts the well-known story of the man who was born blind. It says:

And as Jesus passed by, he saw a man which was blind from his birth. And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind? Jesus answered, Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.

Through this account, we learn that not all trials come because we need to repent. Sometimes, we experience something hard so that the works of God can be made manifest in our lives. When such trials come, we need to have faith to know that our actions (or inactions) are not the root cause for whatever happened. When we are free from that guilt, we can begin to see these trials in the way the Lord wants us to see them and experience the power that comes from relying on the Savior’s Atonement for strength and comfort.

On a more sensitive side, there are trials that come because we chose to use our agency inappropriately. Since we all likely have our own list of trials that came into our lives due to our own personal bad choices, I don’t feel the need to give any examples. In trials such as these, faith in and use of the repentance process is but the first step to overcoming them; if we don’t change whatever we did wrong in the first place, the trial will remain. It is also the main reason that this type of trial is very difficult to overcome: The godly sorrow that leads to real and lasting change is intense and deep; many people aren’t ready to go through that process for some time after the onset of this type of trial. But when we become willing to trade our pride for humility—when we are willing to look for what is right instead of insisting that we are right—we can access the power of the Atonement for lasting change and come closer to the Savior as a result.

Finally, some trials happen because we felt the effects of someone else’s misuse of agency. These trials are also out of our control, but they are definitely not the type that “just happens.” They include, but are unfortunately not limited to: abuse of any kind, neglect, drug/alcohol use and other types of addictions, extramarital affairs, chronic laziness, and the list goes on. This type also begs the question: Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do we have to suffer because of what someone else did?

To understand this, we have to have a deeper comprehension of the agency we fought for in our pre-mortal life. When we talk about agency, we generally discuss the importance of our right to choose. Satan’s idea was to intervene any time someone would have done something contrary to divine law. He wanted to force us to live the Divine Plan his way. We didn’t like that idea there and we don’t like it here, either. How many of us have had the experience of becoming annoyed when someone offers unsolicited advice or tells us that our choice isn’t the best idea because they know better (regardless of whether they actually do)? While never being willing to accept or seek out help is a sure sign of pride, the desire to make our own choices and see them through isn’t just stubbornness. In heaven, we wanted to be taught, we wanted to learn, and we knew we would need guidance, but we ultimately wanted our choices to be our own, without outside intervention. We went to war for that, and we’re here because we won that war.

While we all know that, we have a hard time thinking about it that way when someone uses that right to make bad, and sometimes, terrible decisions that have a ripple effect on the righteous who don’t deserve such unfair consequences. In these situations, we wonder why God didn’t just intervene and stop the whole thing. We have many accounts of the Lord sending angels to warn people and to show practitioners of evil that certain messengers really were sent by Him, but he has never forcibly stopped someone from doing what they had chosen to do. Laman and Lemuel could have continued beating, and ultimately killing, their brothers outside Jerusalem after the angel departed; the angel didn’t take their weapons. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego could have been thrown into the furnace again, for God didn’t destroy it. While that would have gone against all we fought for, there’s a little more to it than that.

In fighting for the right to choose good over evil, we also fought for the ability to be held accountable for our choices, which is one of the reasons why a Savior was necessary. If our decisions aren’t forced—if they are truly our own—we must be held accountable for them, be they good or bad. Amulek learned this lesson in one of the most terrifying ways possible in Alma chapter 14 (in The Book of Mormon). In this portion of scripture, Alma and Amulek were forced to watch women and children who believed in Christ be destroyed by fire. During this awful scene, the following conversation ensued:

And when Amulek saw the pains of the women and children who were consuming in the fire, he also was pained; and he said unto Alma: How can we witness this awful scene? Therefore let us stretch forth our hands, and exercise the power of God which is in us, and save them from the flames. But Alma said unto him: The Spirit constraineth me that I must not stretch forth mine hand; for behold the Lord receiveth them up unto himself, in glory; and he doth suffer that . . . the people may do this thing unto them, according to the hardness of their hearts, that the judgments which he shall exercise upon them in his wrath may be just; and the blood of the innocent shall stand as a witness against them, yea, and cry mightily against them at the last day.

Alma was a prophet. Amulek’s faith was strong enough to stop the horrific scene at hand. Those who believed had sealed their testimonies of the Savior with their blood. However, strong levels of faith and great knowledge of the Divine will not change the misuse of someone else’s agency and accountability will not always come to those who do wickedly in this life. So, what can those who suffer from trials such as these do to find peace? What can they do to overcome a trial that was so unfairly put upon them? They can access the Atonement, but not to seek forgiveness, for repentance is not necessary in this situation. They can use the Atonement to find the strength to forgive. Learning to forgive is one of humanity’s most difficult lessons, perhaps because it is among the few things that can give us the most power and strength to persevere in this life; “Take my yoke upon you,” Jesus said. “For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” We often think of this scripture in Matthew 11 [verses 29-30] as pertaining to being forgiven, but it also gives us the power to forgive, to understand that His judgments will be just and that, in the end, all will be handled the way it should be. That level of trust in the Savior is one not often found in our world today.

I would now like to address another trial caused by a misuse of agency that is very common among even the most well-intentioned person, but does great amounts of damage. It is well summarized in this quote:

Someone who drowns in 7 ft of water is just as dead as someone who drowns in 20 ft of water. [We need to] Stop comparing [trials], stop belittling your[s] or anyone else’s [trial] because it wasn’t “as bad” as someone else’s. This isn’t a competition, we all deserve support & recovery. -Casey Rose

I have yet to meet someone familiar with the primary (children's) song book who doesn’t know at least one verse of I’m Trying to be Like Jesus (Click here to view the lyrics). While we understand that the idea behind the song is that we should love as he did and be an example, as he was, there are times when we try to judge as we think He will and make examples of others. Christ did not atone so that we could decide that the trials given to someone else are nothing compared to what we have been given. One of our preferred ways of doing this is to belittle those both younger and older than us. Parents minimize the seemingly insignificant trials of their children. Grown children of aging parents brush off the realities of old age. The generations are constantly in a verbal war over who had it financially worse, whose medical conditions are more debilitating, or how the age of our mortal bodies should be a determining factor in true intelligence and wisdom.

On a smaller scale, have you ever had an experience in which you wanted to ask for help with something, but decided that you couldn’t or even shouldn’t because you felt like your trial at that moment wasn’t worth wasting someone else’s time? This comes from the unfortunate reality that someone, at some point in your life, misused their agency to make you think that some trials do not merit any type of attention or help. This is not true and it never has been. The Atonement does not pick and choose which trials deserve assistance, and neither should we.

In addition, have you ever experienced a trial in which you knew you needed help, but instead of reaching out, you just prayed and hoped that someone would randomly call you or show up at your door? I do not deny that this has happened to me before and someone actually did call or show up. However, those experiences are the exception, not the rule. 

Throughout the entire New Testament and even when Christ came to the Americas after his resurrection, he taught us that Faith really is a principle of action. Every recorded account of healing in the scriptures occurred when someone physically sought the Savior out, be it for themselves or someone who could not come on their own. Even in the case of the pool of Bethesda, the man who was healed was incapable of seeking Jesus, but he was doing everything in his power to be where he needed to be.

While Jesus is not physically on earth with us at this time, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland reminded us in the October 2008 General Conference that we really can be the ones from whom help is sought and given. He said,

When we speak of those who are instruments in the hand of God, we are reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil. Some of them we walk with and talk with—here, now, every day . . . Indeed heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind.

If you do not have anyone in your life who fits this description, you absolutely can pray to be able to find that person or those people. We weren’t meant to walk the paths of this life alone; Christ already did that so that we would not have to. There are people who can be the help you need to overcome your trials, regardless of which category they fall into.